It was an eye opening experience, writing that brain dump. It was extremely therapeutic. It was like flushing all of the toxins out and leaving myself with a blank slate. I just wrote and wrote until I felt a little empty, in a good way. Part of the reason I take medication is to quiet my brain down, take the edge off. I have so many thoughts, anxieties, worries, daydreams, fantasies floating around my head at all times of the day. It is extremely difficult to concentrate and keep my head above water. I had no idea how severe it was until I starting taking something to tame my brain, so to say. My little Brain Dump doesn't even nick the surface, but it does make a pretty pattern.
I noticed that I started out with relatively good spelling and grammar, but it deteriorated quickly, sometimes almost incomprehensible. I like that. Just like the mind. Just like feelings. I was just typing so quickly, trying to get the words out as they passed through my mind cavity. I began at my normal speed of typing, but soon I was typing faster than I ever have. Thinking/writing that all down honestly took me maybe five minutes. I was just whizzing through thoughts and sentences. Reading it back over, in the short amount of time, I actually didn't remember some of the things I jotted down and I was even a bit surprised by some of the items I mentioned.
It's all very interesting, and it's all so very human.
No comments:
Post a Comment